News is funny

I should watch the evening news more often. Very entertaining! First of all, one of the big stories today, was that Canada is allowing foreign girls to immigrate into Canada if they are strippers, because (apparently) there is a huge shortage of strippers in Canada. I found that tremendously funny. I mean, the USA will let in foreign doctors, nurses, teachers, scientists, and so on. But in Canada? Oh baby... all ya gotta do is take off your clothes for money and you're in! What a joke.

Another lead story today was a huge privacy breach by the CIBC (a large Canadian Bank.) You know how all the banks are always bragging about how "your personal information is safe with them" or whatever? Well, it turns out that the CIBC has been faxing highly confidential customer documents to a small scrap yard in Virginia. They started doing this in 2001. The guy who runs the scrap yard has repeatedly contacted the CIBC to let them know about this breach but the bank has apparently not done anything about it. (Gotta love that "speedy" customer service at the big banks.) Of course in a typically classic "American" twist to this story... the scrap yard is now suing the CIBC for $3 million dollars because supposedly the CIBC faxes were overwhelming the scrap yard's fax machine and were therefore causing an interruption to the business. Right. God bless America.

News is funny.

Ah... now I get it

A few days ago, I wrote about a sandwich that was being auctioned on eBay. I was amused at how high the bids were going and I was convinced that people were just being stupid, and bidding up the price with fake eBay user accounts or something. I mean seriously... who would pay thousands of dollars for a sandwich? Who would pay any amount of money for this sandwich? Well now I get it. In fact, I'll fill you in on the rest of the story. After being delisted and relisted a few times, the sandwich was finally sold for around US$28,000. You might be thinking... that's insane! Crazy! (I know I sure thought so.) But then I read the identity of the buyer: the internet casino site known as GoldenPalace(dot)com. And it finally all made sense to me. GoldenPalace didn't care about the sandwich at all. This was all about marketing. And I must say, it was rather ingenius thinking on their behalf. Where else could you pay a mere $28,000 for commercial time on thousands of TV stations, radio stations, newspapers, websites, magazines and more? GoldenPalace figured out how. They paid what seemed to be a large amount of money for a novelty item, when in fact they were actually paying a rather small amount of money for a ton of "free" advertising. So you see, buying that sandwich was not really so crazy after all.

It's a good idea

It's always a good idea for a person to keep one eye on the clock while cooking a pizza. If you do that, then you won't accidentally cook a 16 minute pizza for 48 minutes. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to open some windows to try to clear all the smoke out of my kitchen. Later!

Embarrassment

Carolyn Parrish is an embarrassment to the human race. The people of Mississauga should be absolutely ashamed of themselves for electing this brain-dead idiot into political office. Carolyn should do Canada a favour and consider a career change to something that would better match her intelligence. At best, she might be qualified for work as a circus clown, but I think she should get a job as a speed bump!

Mmm... expensive sandwich

I just read a news story that proves the old saying, "the truth is stranger than fiction." Respectable news agency, Agence France-Presse (AFP), reports that a 52 year old woman in Florida has a grilled cheese sandwich which appears to contain an image of the Virgin Mary. She has kept the sandwich on her nightstand, in a clear plastic box, for the past 10 years. (Yes, you read that correctly... she has had the sandwich for TEN YEARS!) Then, for some reason, she decides to put the sandwich up for auction on eBay. The bidding was insane, reaching a price of twenty-two thousand dollars. At that point, eBay took notice of the item and thought that it must be a joke, so they removed the listing as of this past Sunday.

UPDATE: The sandwich has been put back on the auction block and is listed on eBay once again. Who are the idiots who bid on things like this? If I could find them, I'd like to sell them a few things too!

Popcorn

This evening I was in the mood for a bit of a snack, so I put a bag of microwave popcorn into the toaster oven. Something immediately seemed wrong. It was almost as if the bag of popcorn didn't quite fit into the toaster oven or something. Strange. I'd never noticed that before, and I eat a lot of popcorn. I thought maybe I'd placed the bag slightly crooked or something, so I took it out and then put it back in again. Nope. Still didn't seem right. It was right around that time when it suddenly occurred to me that microwave popcorn should probably go into a microwave as opposed to a toaster oven. Yep. That did the trick alright. I am totally losing it.