This evening I stopped in at a local Tim Hortons, where I ordered a medium iced cappuccino and a "strawberry sensation" muffin. When I went to pay for it, the cashier informed me that their register wasn't working, and that everything was on the house. Cool. Too bad I didn't know this any sooner... I could have seriously taken advantage of that kind of information!

Just over a month ago, I sent an email to the TSN website to nominate Trish Stratus as a great Canadian. This was for a section on their site where they honour a Canadian athlete for doing something special in the world of sports. Since the TSN television station shows WWE wrestling each week, I thought why not nominate the beautiful Ms. Stratus who had just won the women's wrestling championship at that time. Ignore the issue that professional wrestling is "fake." (That debate was put to rest years ago, when the owner of the WWE publically admitted they script their storylines.) So what? The fact remains that Trish is a phenomenal athlete and entertainer who displays an amazing amount of agility, talent, strength, and skill when she works in the ring. She is world famous and is a great representative for our country. Of course I was mocked by the TSN editor, who questioned whether I had been dropped on my head for making this nomination. Big deal. At any rate, I didn't even know they had published my letter until I saw it today which was a complete coincidence.

I just heard about a new comic strip called "True North" by Kevin Frank. The strip is about the culture shock that an American man experiences after he marries a Canadian woman and immigrates to Canada. From the few samples that I've seen of this comic, I found it quite humourous. Here's a recent sample that gives a rough idea as to what it's all about. And here's one about KD!

Generic Excuse: "I was going to send you a cheque, but I have a male and a female cat, and one of them got hold of it and ate it, so as far as I can figure out... your cheque is in the male."

Yesterday I picked up my new insoles which I had ordered on June 6th. Yes, I know there's an official word to describe those things (as opposed to "insoles") but I keep forgetting what it is. I asked my podiatrist (foot doctor) how long they would last and he told me that for most people the insoles will last for two to three years but, because of my size, I will be lucky if they last me a whole year. I'm not sure if I should be offended or not becase I think he basically just called me a fat ass. (By the way, I'm not actually a "fat ass." I'm just "big boned.") So now I'm supposed to learn how to walk with these things. An hour on the first day, two hours the second day, and so on. After one week I can start wearing them full time.

Dental Update: That was some serious freezing they gave me. It took over five hours for it to wear out.

I probably have the most honest dentist around. Usually they will tell you crap like "this isn't going to hurt a bit." Or maybe the old line about how "it'll feel just like a little mosquito bite." Not my dentist though. Nope. Today I went in for the next stage of my front tooth implant. Before giving me the first of four freezing needles, he said to me, "you might want to grab onto the hand rails and brace yourself... this is going to be nasty." (Uh... yeah okay, thanks doc...) He wasn't kidding either. Those needles hurt so much I think that I'm going to have nightmares about them. (Think what it would feel like to have the corner of a razor blade pressed deeply into your gums in the front of your mouth, and then have someone twist it around and wiggle it while leaning into it for added pressure... yup, that would probably feel quite similar.) The rest of the procedure wasn't too bad though. I couldn't really feel my face after that anyway, so the drilling was actually somewhat relaxing. I kind of enjoyed that part. Now I've got a huge piece of titanium metal embedded into my jaw. I wonder if it will set off metal detectors at the airport? That would be cool! So in my next visit to the dentist, in about a month and half from now, I'll get a temporary tooth installed, and then about six months later I can get the permanent one done. Yay.

That Jared guy (from the Subway commercials) is really starting to annoy me. In a recent commercial, he keeps interrupting someone's private conversation by continuously saying, "and they only have six grams of fat." If it was me that he was talking to, I'd tell him to shut up. They keep portraying Subway as a way to lose weight simply because Jared did it that way. People, let me tell you, if you want to lose weight, you don't have to eat at Subway. You have to simply get up off of your fat ass and start doing something, and quit eating all that crap that you're eating. A double fat ass whopper with extra mayo and cheese, super-sized onion rings, side order of pie, with a diet coke just ain't going to cut it. Jared lost weight because he started exercising and eating nothing but low fat food. The fact that he ate at Subway was insignificant, other than that he ordered low fat food off of their menu. In fact, I think he's a bit of a dweeb for eating the exact same thing for an entire year.

I finally saw "Ultimate X" at Winnipeg's IMAX Theatre. Ultimate X is an extreme sports movie which features events from the 2001 X Games including sports such as: skateboarding, bmx, inline skating, motocross, and street luge. The show was great with some incredible stunts and a very loud sound track. (That's a good thing!) While leaving the theatre, my 12 year old nephew said, "now I know what I want for my birthday... a dirtbike!" I couldn't have said it better myself.

On Friday evening, I tried a Vanilla Coke for the first time ever. If you haven't heard of Vanilla Coke, that's probably because it is a fairly new product. Since I already enjoy regular Coke (or Pepsi), Cherry Cola, Lemon Cola, I just had to try the new Vanilla Coke. So what does it taste like? Well, I'd say that the taste is slightly similar to a Coke float (ie: Coke with ice cream.) So if you enjoy the taste of an ice cream float, you probably wouldn't mind the new Vanilla Coke. I liked it, but it is not my number one choice by any means. Personally, my favourite would still have to be a regular Coke (or Pepsi) on ice, with a real slice of lemon in it. Mmm!

Public Service Announcement: According to City of Winnipeg Bylaw 1573/77, you must be parked at least 9 metres away from a stop sign. (Apparently, 4 metres is not good enough.) This public service announcement was brought to you courtesy of Winnipeg City Police Officer #186. Thanks to Officer #186, the City of Winnipeg has become $65 richer, the streets are safer, and I myself have learned a valuable lesson in life.

Someone sent me this email the other day, and I thought it offered a few good lessons to live by. Check it out...

The Cowboy's Guide To Life

Don't squat with your spurs on.

Don't interfere with something that ain't botherin' you none.

Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.

The easiest way to eat crow is while it's still warm. The colder it gets, the harder it is to swaller.

If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

If it don't seem like it's worth the effort, it probably ain't.

It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with watches you shave his face in the mirror every morning.

Never ask a barber if you need a haircut.

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

Don't worry about bitin' off more'n you can chew; your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.

Always drink upstream from the herd.

Generally, you ain't learnin' nothing when your mouth's a-jawin'.

Tellin' a man to git lost and makin' him do it are two entirely different propositions.

If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there with ya.

Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta that comes from bad judgment.

When you give a personal lesson in meanness to a critter or to a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.

When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier than puttin' it back.

Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's sure crucial to know what it was.

The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

And in the local news... there was a fire at the SCU yesterday, apparently resulting from a lightning strike on a nearby transformer. Due to some speedy work by the firemen and the electrician, the SCU is open for business as usual. (And I thought I might get a day off. Doh!)

The Canadian Grand Prix was held this past weekend. It was a great race, definitely the best one of this season. Having attended the CDN GP four times in the past, it was rather difficult to merely watch it on television rather than being amidst the action in Montreal. Although one thing that I didn't miss was shelling out the big $$$ for the race tickets!

I had a voicemail message (at work) from a user who was having printer trouble. No matter what she tried, it simply would NOT print. Furthermore, she described a curious error message which appeared in her printer's LCD display. The message read, "ADD PAPER." Her voicemail ended with a request that I come assist her as soon as possible.

Instead of making the trip up to her office, I sent off an email in which I wrote, "the ADD PAPER message means that you need to add paper to the internal paper tray. Simply open the paper drawer, and add more paper."

She sent me an email a few minutes later which read, "thank you!"

Did I mention that she was blonde?

Time to start doing sit-ups. And that's all I'm gonna say about that.

Every time I go to see my doctor or my dentist, I always phone ahead to make an appointment. Yet, when I arrive at the appointed time, I have to sit and wait for what seems like an eternity until I am actually served. (I should start billing them for MY time!) Today I went to see a podiatrist (foot doctor.) My appointment was for 12:00pm. I arrived five minutes early and yet I was only called upon at about 12:30pm. The person following me must not have been too thrilled either. She had an appointment for 12:30pm, and yet I kept the podiatrist busy until around 1:15pm. Anyway, I have major pain in my feet and apparently it can be relieved with a set of custom insoles. (They aren't cheap either, so it's lucky that I have insurance for this sort of thing from my work benefit package.) It should take about two or three weeks until I get the insoles. Hopefully they will do the trick.

Today I practiced the fine art of break & entry. What a rush! Luckily the cops didn't catch us. Okay, I suppose I should explain myself. The real story is that one of my friends (known as "D") had locked his keys inside his house. We tried for about half an hour to try to find a "gentle" way inside. But since every door and window on the house was locked from the inside, I suggested that we might have to simply break one of the windows. My friend finally agreed. It took him a little longer to decide, since he was the one who will end up paying for the damage. As for me, I just happened to have a crowbar in my car, which did a rather "smashing" job if I don't say so myself. Hey, it was kinda fun. I think I could get into this! As long as it's not my own window that gets broken.